Removing Attachments

What Are Attachments?

Attachments are an inevitable aspect of life. We become attached to our parents, our friends, our pets, our belongings and our romantic partners. We build on these attachments, confusing attachments with relationships. When we become attached to outcomes and things, we are no longer truly coming from a place of centeredness. When this happens, we find ourselves out of balance within ourselves. This causes us to act differently than we would if we were centered, and causes us to lose focus on the Creator, and instead focus on the distractions of life; attachments themselves. Attachments and cords are the same thing. Cords are metaphysical, connecting our spiritual bodies to things around us. These cords syphon energy from our spirits, and if we are not connected fully to the Creator, this is very draining and exhausting for our souls.

We are raised to believe that attachments are good. That being attached to our outcomes, our goals, our loved ones and our paths were good things, that these attachments were vital to our very existence. But with this ideology, these attachments also create limiting behaviors, and limiting mindsets. We allow toxic family members to be involved in our lives, influencing our decisions and often times obstructing our higher calling, our motivations, and our ultimate happiness. We confuse attachment and love; assuming that in order to love our families, we must be attached to them. But this is not the case. Loving and honoring our families is not the same as being attached to them.

Because attachments keep us from flowing freely through life; for all parties involved. Attachments keep us from loving unconditionally because we are only loving these individuals if they are making us feel comfortable, which is often times not the case. Once we begin to remove our emotional attachments to people, and instead loving them unconditionally with no attachment to the outcomes, we begin to experience true love and kindness.

One point that I strongly want to express is that living free from attachments does not equate living without relationships, goals, motivation, or emotions. It simply means that you are not emotionally attached to any outcomes, people or things. We are sovereign in our practice, following only the Creator. When we have attachments, we are having our energy stolen from us. Like a leech or a tick, these attachments suck energy from us, hindering our progression in life. By removing attachments, we are able to see through illusions and begin to find ourselves.

Removing attachments requires a spiritual protection surrounding us, but also requires physical changes in our lives. This could be pushing ourselves to be more independent, or it could be as extreme as leaving a toxic relationship or setting firm boundaries with people around you. Boundaries are good for us, as they help us to maintain our self respect, but also our personal space and energy. This practice would be the same as “cutting cords”, which can be done via meditation.

In order to truly ascend in this life, we must remain free from these attachments. To remain free of materialistic obsessions, attachments to those around us and to self soothe and heal ourselves. When we remain free of these attachments and desires, we take a step closer towards becoming conduits, towards becoming hollow bones in which the Creator can work through. This isn’t an easy task, and every one of us struggles with these feelings; as it is all about balance and temperance in order for this to be healthy and good. Because not having attachments to outcomes doesn’t mean we don’t care, it doesn’t mean that we are emotionally distanced from the situation. It means that we are not ruled by our emotions, that we have “no horse in the race” and simply wish for the best for everyone involved, for everyone to be happy, healthy, and well in spirit.

Removing The Attachments

Removing attachments is far more difficult than we are led to believe. It requires us to see ourselves in the 100% truth, which can be painful. I tend to have an anger problem, so addressing that aspect of myself and getting to the root cause of that anger was vital to me removing cords that were feeding that anger, as well as cords that I had pushed out to others. Taking ownership for when WE are pushing cords and attachments out to others is so important to truly working through attachments. By addressing these cords that we create, as well as cords that others create to us, we are better able to find centeredness and happiness in our lives.

After we have acknowledged and taken ownership of our own faults and short comings, we can then begin addressing the cords others have attached to us. Meditate, and see these cords with your third eye. Trace them back until you discover who they are coming from, and then metaphysically remove the cord. Then in your physical life, set boundaries and make adjustments to help keep this cord from forming again. It’s always wise to expect people who have cords attached to you, to desire you once the cord is removed. Because they are attached to you, and you just removed the attachment, it is likely they will not handle this well. Think of it like how infants behave when you take their binky or their favorite blanket/toy. They feel vulnerable, naked, alone, and uncomforted. It is not your responsibility nor duty to comfort people spiritually, energetically or emotionally beyond your own desires to do so. That is the CREATORS job, and it’s their responsibility to build a connection, an attachment if you will, to the Creator. Not to you!

After removing the cord it will likely come back (Remember that whole, we all fall short thing? Often times WE will rebuild the cord ourselves). Practice removing the cord as many times as you can; as many times as you need to in order to permanently remove the cord. Depending on how strong, how long you’ve had the cord, and how strong spiritually, emotionally, and mentally the other person is determines how hard the cord is to remove.

Give yourself some grace, this is not a race.

Victoria Dellapaolera
Victoria Dellapaolera

Victoria is a Christian minister practicing spiritual healing and development in Williston, North Dakota. Victoria has worked with horses her entire life, and has learned many of her healing techniques from the horses.

She graduated from West Virginia University in 2020 Magna Cum Laude with a bachelors degree in Human Services and Sports and Exercise Psychology; gaining her associates degree in Farm and Ranch Management and Equitation from Dawson Community College in Glendive, Montana in 2012.

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